This was the last straw. I thought I hated Skip Bayless as much as I humanly could. This “All He Does Is Win” song, like all other DJ Steve Porter songs, is complete and utter garbage. As If we needed more of this guy, ESPN for some reason decided to make a one minute, glorifying music video to pay homage to Tim and Skip Tebow.
I have nothing against Tebow, but I have a lot against the coverage he’s getting. I finished my last final on Tuesday morning and got back in time to watch the replay of 1st&10. What do I see? A question regarding Tim Tebow. Fine, whatever. Wednesday comes, I wake up in time to watch the live version of First Take, what do I see? A topic regarding Tim Tebow. Thursday comes, once again I wake up and First Take is on, and WHAT DO IT SEE? A TOPIC ABOUT TIM FREAKING TEBOW.
ESPN knows what they’re doing. They did it with Brett Favre. I guess the ESPN formula is: constant coverage + viewers = must like the topic. No, no and no. I actually used to find the 1st&10 segment enjoyable, even in the (gulp) Woody Paige days. Now it consists of Skip yelling, Tebow, more Tebow, NBA, Skip yelling, Skip owning everyone but Stephen A. Smith, Tebow, NBA and finishing with Tebow. It’s unbearable.
I wish Stephen A. would be on every show with Skip, because Stephen A. is actually competent when he talks. Unlike the “analysts” or the “Two Live Stews” (I feel dumber just typing that), Stephen A. makes solid points to back up his Skip-like persona. I’m thankful that ESPN gave Smith his job back, his NBA insight is a welcome sight to a network that desperately seeks competence in all their sports coverage.
We watch ESPN because it’s the norm. It’s what we’ve grew up on. We aren’t going to watch VS or FoxSports. There’s a reason The Best Damn Sports Show Period didn’t make it. ESPN is king. This king is making Skip Bayless it’s self righteous prince. I hate it, I know plenty of other people that hate it and it MUST stop.
As if you needed another reason to hate Skip Bayless…
10-6-0 last week
108-81-5 for the season
Home team in BOLD and CAPS
FALCONS (-11½) over Jaguars
Yes this game already happened. Yes the Falcons covered. Yes I would have really chosen the Falcons to cover.
BUCCANEERS (+7) over Cowboys
Subtract the Cowboys fluke victory over the 49ers early in the season and you get a Cowboys team with not one impressive victory this whole season. They’re more famous for their colossal collapses then their victories. On the road in a must win game this has all the ingredients to a disappointing Cowboys loss. They might not lose but they sure as hell won’t cover.
GIANTS (-7) over Redskins
There’s no doubt that Eli Manning is an elite QB, there’s also no doubt that the Giants are the superior team this week. Take the Giants in a blowout.
Packers (-14½) over CHIEFS
The ONE week I didn’t choose the Packers in my pool was last week. Just my luck huh? Even though I picked them to cover in this post I decided to skip that game and pick the 49ers instead. Yay. That worked out well. The ½ point kind of scares me, but when in doubt, choose Rodgers.
Saints (-7) over VIKINGS
Last time the Saints were on the road in a dome they shockingly lost to the Rams. There’s no way that can happen again can it? CAN IT!!!??? I have faith in the Saints even with Peterson coming back.
Seahawks (+3½) over BEARS
I was going to choose the Bears at home, but then I remembered about Cutler…and Forte…and BEAST MODE. Take the Seahawks in the upset.
Dolphins (+1) over BILLS
Wow the Dolphins couldn’t wait to get rid of Sparano couldn’t they? After winning four of five they finally have a bad game and POOF, Sparano is gone. But heck, if it gets them that much closer to Jeff Fisher or Bill Cowher more power to them. I was getting sick of the whole “sunglasses at any time of the day” look anyway.
TEXANS (-6½) over Panthers
This could be a trap game for Houston coming off that amazing comeback. I emphasize could. Arian Foster and Ben Tate might be the best running back duo in the league, and the Panthers are near the bottom of the NFL in rush defense. TJ Yates could literally run it every play and the Texans could win by two scores. I wouldn’t mind seeing that actually…
Titans (-6½) over COLTS
If the Titans and Chris Johnson can’t beat a winless Colts team by a TD then the’re dead to me.
Bengals (-7) over RAMS
How good is AJ Green? Every time I turn to Red Zone on Sunday he’s making some spectacular catch over multiple defenders or sprinting past safeties for TD’s. Is he already a top-10 receiver? Expect multiple TD’s coming his way from Dalton this week.
Lions (-1½) over RAIDERS
This will be a slow, ugly, nasty, turnover filled game. What’s the over/under on penalties? 25? 30? The Raiders have shown no signs of life the past two weeks. Ford and McFadden are out per the usual. I don’t see Stanford Routt (or whoever has to help him) limiting Calvin Johnson. Titus Young is a name to watch here too. Sadly, I can see at least two long bomb TD’s from Stafford to either one of those guys. I haven’t even mentioned Mr. Suh’s return…
Patriots (-7) over BRONCOS
Tebow finally failed to cover last week. Why do I say this? Well because I put money on him of course! Facing such an explosive offense like the Patriots is something the Broncos haven’t seen since they played Detroit, and we all know how that game went (in Denver too). The Broncos will score, probably 20+, but it won’t be enough to get within the seven points. The Patriots win by double digits.
Jets (+3) over EAGLES
So the Eagles win one game convincingly and they’re suddenly three point favorites against the Jets? Huh? The Jets have been lighting it up as of late, scoring at least 28 in their last three games. I have very little confidence in a still bewildered Eagles team covering three points against a very hot Jets team.
CARDINALS (-7) over Browns
The Browns will be without Colt McCoy, which might not be horrible actually. Seneca Wallace isn’t a terrible QB. He can run, throw some good passes and has been in the league for a long time. Wait…did I just spend two sentences praising Seneca Wallace? Ugh. Take the Larry Fitzgerald’s instead.
Ravens (-3) over CHARGERS
Ray Lewis is back, the Ravens are in full playoff mode and the Chargers are still very turnover prone. The Chargers have been showing signs of life lately, but against the best defense in the league I can’t see them competing with Baltimore.
Steelers (+1) over 49ERS
I went back and forth on this one. Apart of me likes the 49ers at home, to pound the rock with Gore and Hunter and feast on Big Ben’s leg. The other part of me has seen Big Ben play with terrible injuries before, I’ve seen the Pittsburgh receivers tear it up and I’ve seen what Polamalu and Co. can do to offenses. The 49ers need to convert all those FG’s to TD’s if they have any chance at winning a playoff game. Does it start here? I don’t think so.
My dad: “I bet Tebow takes down the Jets this week.””
Me: “No way, Jets with Revis and that complex defense will make Tebow look stupid.”
My dad: “Wanna bet? Money talks son.”
Me: “Come on that’s easy money. $10?”
My dad: “Make it $20 Mr. Confident.”
Me: “You got it. Wow, that was the easiest $20 I ever made.”
I really would have gone more if my dad wanted to, I was that confident that the Tebow Express would make a valiant stop against the Jets this week. Me and my dad bet football spreads all the time, but this one was, in my opinion, one of the easiest ones of the year.
The Broncos were coming off an emotional high after their win in Kansas City that Sunday. The Jets? The exact opposite. They were obliterated by the Patriots Sunday night. Great defenses travel, so I thought even off a short week the Jets would give Tebow enough looks to really make him struggle.
I’ve seen Denver’s defense shine before, specifically against my Raiders a couple weeks back in Oakland, but I still wasn’t a believer. Mark Sanchez has always been a late in-season bloomer, playing better as the season went on, so I was expecting a turn of the corner type game for him.
My last reason? The Jets are simply the better, more talented team. No way were the Jets going to not come into this game fired up, desperate for a win after their embarrassing loss at home last week.
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong again.
I guess I have to start respecting this Tebow guy now. It’s not that I don’t like him, it’s just I’m so damn sick of hearing his name that I wouldn’t be surprised if he surpassed “Brett Favre” on my “If I Hear His Name One More Damn Time I’m Going To Punch A Whole In My Wall” list.
Yes, “he just wins games” is a phrase that also is getting severely overplayed, but it’s true. The Broncos are winning, albeit the ugliest possible way a football game can be won, and at the same time chasing the Raiders for the division lead in the AFC West. If Tebow was in the NFC South I would care a little bit less than I do now, but the fact he’s in my own division makes it even worse. He’s winning and hurting my team at the same time.
Tim, I respect you, you’re a man of faith, spirituality and whole-heartedness, but I beg you, stop winning games. Stop haunting my TV with constant coverage from ESPN and more specifically Skip Bayless, who, if you are indeed the second coming of Christ, be my Judas to your Jesus.
It has to end eventually right?
7-8 last week
73-55-4 for the season
Home team in BOLD and CAPS
Jets (+7) over BRONCOS — L
FALCONS (-6½) over Titans
Everything in my head is saying “Don’t pick the Falcons. Don’t pick the Falcons. Don’t pick the Falcons”. So why am I picking them? Good question. And honestly I still don’t know why I am. Maybe because they’re the more talented team. Maybe because they’re at home. Maybe because they’re determined to comeback after their heartbreaking should-be-win-but-loss-because-of-the-stupidest-call-I’ve-ever-seen last week. I like the Matt Ryan to Roddy White connection to win by a TD this week.
Bills (+2½) over DOLPHINS
I’ve been a big proponent of the “Dolphins aren’t as bad as they look” mentality. They’ve covered the past two weeks and have looked like a team that actually cares about their play on the field (Hear that Colts?). I’ve also been a big proponent (except last week) of the “Bills aren’t as good as they look” mentality. So what gives this week? The Dolphins normally are terrible at home. They beat the Redskins last week but really, the Redskins are just as bad as the Colts. This won’t be a barn burner, but I like the Bills to win outright.
RAVENS (-7) over Bengals
I hate the Ravens. No, not because I hate the dumb look that Joe Flacco has after every incomplete pass or the city of Baltimore (seriously though what’s there to like?), but because of how awful it feels to bet on them. I lost a survivor pool in just Week 2 of this year because of them. They didn’t cover last week against the Seahawks a week after a great comeback win against the Steelers in Pittsburgh. What the hell? Without AJ Green I give the edge to the Ravens. I’d be lying if I said I was confident in this pick though.
Jaguars (-1) over BROWNS
I only picked this game because I had to. Really, does anyone care for this game? I’m 95.9% confident than the state of Florida could care less for this game. Heck I’m not even sure if they know they have a team. Cleveland? I’m sure they’re still lying in their corners wondering how Lebron left them for Miami. Yeah…shocker!
Raiders (-1) over VIKINGS
Adrian Peterson vs. the Raiders 25th ranked rush defense. Jared Allen vs. Carson Palmer. Jared Allen vs. Michael Bush. Jared Allen vs anyone who gets in his way. LOUD Minnesota crowds vs. Carson Palmer. For a 2-7 team the Vikings present tons of problems for the Raiders. I had my doubts last week on the road against the Chargers. Palmer proved me wrong. Here’s hoping that Palmer me right this week. Take the residents of the Black Hole. And no I’m not talking about Ray J or Reggie Bush (Kris didn’t hit it).
Panthers (+7) over LIONS
This could be my genius pick of the week, or it could end up like my Bills and Vikings picks last week. The Lions are banged up: Calvin Johnson is dealing with concussion symptoms, Jahvid Best is out (what else is new?) and Mathew Stafford is dealing with a broken right index finger (what else is new?). Cam Newton is playing on turf. Let me repeat: Cam Newton. Turf. I expect this to be high scoring and a fun game to watch. Lions take it in a close one.
PACKERS (-14) over Buccaneers
I finally manned up and decided not to choose the Packers last weekend. I tried to buck the trend after they failed to cover a couple big spreads earlier in the season. Well, they sure made me look like a moron. Home, again, facing a below average Buccaneers team? Take the two touchdowns. Heck, tease that sucker up.
Cowboys (-7½) over REDSKINS
“In the 11th round Team Rubicon selects Demarco Murray!” ……. **everyone wonders in silence for 20 seconds who the hell Demarco Murray is** ……
Yes, Demarco Murray was actually drafted in our family fantasy league. I honestly didn’t know who he was until I searched his name seconds after he was drafted.
The funny thing? Team Rubicon dropped, yes dropped, Murray the week before his huge debut start for the Cowboys.
As you would expect he was picked up immediately the next week off the waiver wire.
It’s safe to say Team Rubicon isn’t very happy with that drop.
Did I mention his other running backs are Shonne Greene and Ahmad Bradshaw?
49ERS (-9½) over CARDINALS
A wise man once said: “Good teams win, great teams cover”. The 49ers are 8-0-1 against the spread this season. Until they prove us wrong, take them.
Seahawks (+1) over RAMS
Another game that I pick because I must. After the Rams lost in OT to the Cardinals by the single worst way possible I will forever hold a grudge against them. Marshawn Lynch is also quietly having a very good season. Take Seattle against the Rams in a game that no one really wants to watch.
BEARS (-3½) over Chargers
I sorta kinda but not really wanted to pick the Chargers in the upset here. I also sorta kinda really believe the Bears could kill the Chargers. San Diego, traveling across the country against a tough Bears team that seems to be in NFC divisional round mode already. Can the Chargers stop Forte? Can the Chargers be smart enough not to kick to Devin Hester? Can FOX not zoom in on Norv Turner’s horrendous neck wrinkles, forcing me to vomit whatever food I’m currently chewing at that time? No, no and no.
GIANTS (-4½) over Eagles
No Michael Vick. No Jeremy Maclin. A sleepy, broke DeSean Jackson. The Eagles are on the road. The Giants are coming off a tough loss to the 49ers. Andy Reid is still coaching the Eagles. Need I go on?
PATRIOTS (-14½) over Chiefs
Tyler Palko is starting for the Chiefs. You’re welcome.